Say 'yes' to saying 'no'

Why is it so hard to say no?

Well, maybe for everyone but the toddler running around your house with their diaper on their head.

We can become very accustomed to constantly saying ‘yes’ to every demand that comes our way. Our new normal quickly becomes living in a state of exhaustion, stretched too thin, and constantly feeling inadequate. Maybe worst of all, everyone around us seems to have gotten it all figured out. They seem to be able to do all of their necessary 'adulting' tasks, plus have a booming social life and take wonderful trips, all perfectly documented on their social media profiles for us to see and follow.

'Seem' being the operative word here. It is just as possible that others are looking at you and your life, thinking the exact same things. We then all end up stuck in an endless loop of over-extending ourselves in an effort to keep up appearances.

So how do you actually get off this exhausting ride?

1. Slow Down

Take a moment to actually consider what is being asked of you. Do you want to say yes? Do you have the time? Do you have the energy? Our ‘yes’ responses can become so automatic that we don’t actually take the time consider whether it is the right thing for us.

2. Know Your Value

Put your needs first. Your time and energy are important.

3. Check in with Yourself

Are you people pleasing? So many of us have a deep fear of rejection which can be acutely triggered when we are approached with an invitation.

4. Offer an Alternative

“I can’t go for coffee today, but what about next week?”

5. Practice!

The more you say ‘no’ and realize the world doesn’t fall apart around you, the easier it gets.

If you are struggling to maintain your boundaries by saying 'no' to those around you, I would love to help!